Q:What is the best way to show an INTJ how much you care for them?
Making a honest and genuine attempt to understand and more importantly, accept who they are.
Show them you care by listening, questioning when questionable, and if already accepted by the INTJ, take care of them when they neglect to take care of themselves.
Q:Something I'm noticing is that the ENTJ is often painted as the "villain" type in fiction, and after looking through many forums, I've found that a lot of people find ENTJs, especially female ENTJs, to be "crazy" and "unmanageable."
Why is this so? What makes the ENTJ more "villainous" than other types, and why are we painted as being so crazy? Many characters that other people type as ENTJs do not seem like ENTJs at all, but rather weaker versions of other types or people who are not fully developed and therefore not fully one type at all. Or, am I wrong, and am I set up to be a world dictator or something?
It’s even broader than just ENTJ (because INTJs get it too) it’s Ni dominants. Ni and Se are opposed and it’s like 10% Ni and 30% Se (the other 60% is the Ne Si opposition).
Really roughly and really generally, Ps tend to get into creative pursuits, which means a lot of SPs, because, like I mentioned above, they are about 30% of the population. So, you’ve got this “I’m an Se dominant and my inferior Ni is bad because it’s directly opposed and really malnourished and so I must squelch any presence of it so I don’t have to deal with it ever,” sort of attitude and that kind of universal struggle (the conflicting parts of us in conflict) is bound to show up somewhere in people’s creative works.
Along with Ni dominants being infrequent, there’s Te that’s a problem. There aren’t more F dominants than T dominants, but they are “louder”. Louder in that they get worked up about things. So the “Te is mean, obnoxious, rude, demanding, crazy, unmanageable, detached,” attitude is, again, manifested in people’s creative works.
And female, ENTJs? Society and Psychology (which pains me to no end) think that women are “Fs (specifically, Fe)” and men are “Ts (specifically Te).” You know, the “women are caring, socially oriented, concerned with the feelings of others,” etc, and “men are logical, rational, have activity oriented relationships,” thing.
Really, it’s just that Fs are those things and Ts are those things. So a girl who is a T, is seen as “contrary, unreasonable, unmanageable,” and things like that because they don’t follow, “F” type schemata, gender roles, display rules, etc. And then even more so, an ENTJ girl who has an inferior F function (Fi) is like “What the heck are these unspoken social rules and political correctness (Fe)?! I don’t understand. Why would I use veiled language (Fe)? That’s not useful or efficient (Te)! And why the heck do you want me to pause and assess the things I like, don’t like, value, believe in all the time (Fi)?! That’s not efficient or impartial at all (Te)!”
You get those weak characters you mentioned when you have a writer that thinks they understand that “type of person,” but they really don’t, so the character ends up being overall inconsistent.
The take home message is that ENTJ abundance is low enough for them to be misunderstood and sometimes even vilified, but fundamentally *distinct, because people recognize the type when they see it. The ENTJ’s functions are functions that are generally associated with males, so, a female ENTJ doesn’t fit the “woman” schemata, and gender roles because their brain functions under “male gender roles.”
*Distinct: Recognizably different in nature from something else of a similar type.
Q:Hi! I'm an ENFP, and a gal, and my mom's an INTJ, and we find it VERY difficult to get along with one another! Aren't these two types supposed to be golden together? What can I do to make things easier on our relationship? I don't wanna fight with my mom all the time!
If you find it very difficult to get along, then one or both of you are mistyped. The INTJ/ENFP relationship has such a famous reputation for being “perfect,” or as you said, “golden,” because the types’ functions and function placement are conducive to a healthy and relatively effortless relationship:
ENFP: Ne Fi Te Si
INTJ: Ni Te Fi Se
The perceiving functions (Ne/Ni, Si/Se respectively) are compliments, resulting in a positive dynamic relationship and the judging functions (Te/Fi) are the same, resulting in open and effective communication.
The friction in your relationship with your mother would suggest dissimilar and/or opposing functions.
The best way to make any relationship easier is to genuinely attempt effective communication and by extension, understanding.
Q:What about INTJ's? Are there any in modern television shows?
Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock
Daria Morgendorffer, Daria
Q:what is the relationship between an ENFP and INTJ?
I talk about this often, but figure this is a great opportunity to use a quote I’ve been holding onto for a while.
“We’re like the little toy robot on the shelf that isn’t brightly colored enough or with enough flashing lights and sirens for most kids to look at. The little ENFP notices it because it doesn’t fit in and questions what about this made someone so sure somebody would want to buy it. In its uniqueness and its quiet inconspicuous way it is actually kind of cute. You go over to it and casually ask a question into the air. “Hmmm, what do you do little one?” Suddenly it perks up a little. It seems confused. Were you talking to it? From the apparent angle of your gaze and the context of your manner… and, well, it certainly is apparent what everything else here does… so it logically makes sense for it to be me… but, well, what are the odds?… I mean right?… This is a child and children have not been previously known to care about me… I could have always told my manufacturers that I was a serious scientific instrument and not a goddamn toy… wrong aisle… wrong demographic… omg… what is wrong with these people??!?!… wait… the kid’s still… looking… at me???… this is weird… what do I do?… I mean, it’s practically unprecedented… oh ****… I don’t have a contingency plan for this… uh, should I have not moved?… oh ****… I mean, the odds are real low here but this one might be some kind of savant… or… well, maybe it has some use for us!!!… maybe something we didn’t think of yet… there are such things… it could be an alien child exploring this culture and seeing something that stands out!… god, that would be the life, right?… going off to see other planets and worlds… things I’ve never even dreamed of and let’s face it the options for real practical potential are very limited if I just stay on this shelf… it’s… worth a… shot?… it does appear to at least be an unusually inquisitive child… inquiry is, after all, one of the fundamental uses we were meant for… and… for some reason… some, unknown reason… I think I might just… like… them?… Now .0000000354 seconds since the initial approach and this reasoning started it blinks its little visual sensors just once, cocks its head just a little to an angle, and ventures this timid but hopeful reply, “We are meant to help uncover the secrets of the universe…” in a calm, steady, and seemingly genuine voice. The ENFP child performs some other mental and emotional operation much much faster than the INTJ robot could have reasonably predicted and jumps with joy. It surprisingly exclaims, “OH! I always wanted one of those!!!” and snatches it off the shelf with glee. The robot is still not sure about any of this as he is hugged and cooed over and carried off to be put into a shopping basket while this child is employing the most amazing and surprising “logic” it has ever heard on its parent to ascertain that this seemingly boring little toy is understood as a necessity or something that even makes sense for the child to have. Oh, it makes sense alright. The things this little ENFP is going to do with that robot! *just hope it actually works like it said* *temporary consideration of whether it really was a good idea* *looks down and sees the concerned but hopeful manner being temporarily (and I assure you coincidentally) displayed on the functional readout screen in the form of a heart* “Yes, Mom! I’m sure! I need it! I will really use it.” And the little robot sighs the biggest sigh of relief ever.
That’s the start of a beautiful friendship ideally. Yes, problems can happen. Love, patience, and understanding can overcome them.”
- Titan (An INTJ)





